Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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