I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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