Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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