no. you can't hotbox the world.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
