A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
