the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
His hands were made for my vagina.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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