Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
