go do what you do best...puke behind churches
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
