a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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