ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
