She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
