My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i just made my gag reflex go away.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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