The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
