she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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