She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
