I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
