Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
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