marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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