We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
