Sry I called you an 8
I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Randomize
