And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
