so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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