I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
