Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
