would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
