Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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