So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
