Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
