I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
