She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
