i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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