Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
