i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
