The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
