Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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