I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
