I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
40s are totally the cure
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize