i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
