Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
