What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Let's paint friendship bongs
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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