he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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