Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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