mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
