Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I just threw up on my dentist
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
he thought i was a dude.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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