I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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