Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize