Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
