I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
