Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
