My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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