I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
dude. I can hear the air.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
