I molested 6 butterflies tonight
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
